Hit the Motherload

Comedy Central is launching a broadband network tomorrow called
Motherload. Why is this cool? It will feature a bunch of new content that you can't see on TV. It's kinda like MTV's Overdrive except that it should suck less. Hopefully it will work with Firefox, but I'm not holding my breath. The big draw for me is the extras and clips from The Daily Show and South Park, but hopefully the other stuff will also be cool.

Addendum: It does seem work with Firefox.

Not Scary

MSNBC just put out a list of the TV's Top 10 Scariest Characters. The only thing is that none of them are scary. The list:

10. The entire supporting cast of 'Desperate Housewives'
9. Mandy, '24'
8. Silvio Dante, 'The Sopranos'
7. The monkey in Chris Griffin's closet, 'Family Guy'
6. Emily Gilmore, 'Gilmore Girls'
5. T-Bag, 'Prison Break'
4. John Locke, 'Lost'
3. Arvin Sloane, 'Alias'
2. Eric Cartman, 'South Park’
1. Charles Montgomery Burns, 'The Simpsons'

What are you writing?

Sorry, only a couple people will get that.

Frappr

I just created a Frappr map for this site. What is Frappr you ask? From their site:

"Frappr is an online tool that lets you map out the zip code where you live, work, vacation, or anything else! You can then share your unique URL with friends and find out where the rest of them live and work in relation to everyone else."

So would you, the 5 people that visit this site, do me a favor and go there and add yourself? I don't care if you use a fake name. You can also give shoutouts, so you might enjoy that.

Indescribable

Most of the stuff I post here isn't exactly crude, but sometimes the funniest video you've ever seen is just that and you can't help but put up a link. I think it might be real, but even if it's not it's worth posting. Enjoy.

Sealed Off

Because they apparently don't have enough going on, the The White House is using our tax dollars to go after the genius satirical newspaper The Onion. It seems they use the presidential seal on the part of their site where they parody the weekly radio address. They were sent a letter saying that the seal "is not to be used in connection with commercial ventures or products in any way that suggests presidential support or endorsement."

As if any of their readers would ever believe that they were supported by the administration? Give me a break. And the site is free!

Nazi Twins

These girls are more evil than the Olsen Twins. Not possible? Check out this crazy shit....

From an ABC News story:

"They may remind you another famous pair of singers, the Olsen Twins, and the girls say they like that. But unlike the Olsens, who built a media empire on their fun-loving, squeaky-clean image, Lamb and Lynx Gaede are cultivating a much darker personna. They are white nationalists and use their talents to preach a message of hate.

Known as "Prussian Blue" — a nod to their German heritage and bright blue eyes — the girls from Bakersfield, Calif., have been performing songs about white nationalism before all-white crowds since they were nine.

"We're proud of being white, we want to keep being white," said Lynx. "We want our people to stay white … we don't want to just be, you know, a big muddle. We just want to preserve our race."

Hooray for Joey

I'm back from Joe and Dana's wedding. Pictures are available here.

Flock Me

Flock is going to rock your world.

PTC Top 10

Today the Parents Television Council released its list of the 'Top Ten Best and Worst Shows for family viewing on prime time broadcast television.'

Among the 10 'worst' shows for families were the following:
Family Guy
American Dad
That 70's Show
Arrested Development

Somehow The Simpsons did not make the list. Here is their review of Family Guy:

"This unbelievably foul animated series made a strong come back after being off the air for two years, thanks to the success of DVD sales among young males. The raunchy series follows the Griffins, a blue-collar New England family which includes a martini-swilling, talking dog and a matricidal baby bent on world domination. The show bases its humor on scatological and sexual references (including masturbation, incest, bestiality, necrophilia), and spoofs on popular culture. Institutions such as the church and family are held up to ridicule on a near-weekly basis. One episode this season featured Meg being deflowered by Jimmy Fallon on Saturday Night Live."

If I had never seen the show (god forbid) this review would have hooked me. I realize this was not their goal. They went on to say:

"Parents of young children should be especially concerned because Family Guy’s animated format is sure to attract young viewers. Shockingly, since its return in May, Family Guy is the highest ranked show among 12-17 year olds, and the fifth highest ranked show among children ages 2 to 11."

My response to this? If you don't pay attention to what your toddler is watching, you deserve what you get. If you still believe that every cartoon is made for children AFTER 17 SEASONS OF THE SIMPSONS then you are completely clueless and the PTC cannot help you no matter how many scathing reviews they write.

Ferrell Strikes Again

If you're a fan of Anchorman, you're sure to love the new Will Ferrell/Adam McKay movie High, Wide, and Handsome. If you're not a fan of Anchorman, well, there's something wrong with you.

The movie features Ferrell as NASCAR driver Ricky Bobby and co-stars John C. Reilly and Sasha Baron Cohen (Ali G). If these pictures are any indication, it's gonna be awe-some. Just the idea of a team sponsored by Perrier is funnier than most other comedies.

Fractal Cabbage

This chou Romanesco is quite possibly the world's trippiest vegetable.

Rocky VI

Apparently Sly Stallone has written and will direct the sixth installment of the Rocky series. Here's the description:

"Rocky, lonely and retired in Philadelphia, comes out of retirement, intending to fight a few low-profile local fights. He's approached to fight a match with reigning heavyweight champ Mason "The Line" Dixon, and soon his comeback ignites a media firestorm."

Shooting is scheduled to begin in December. Here is an analysis of the box office grosses for the past Rocky films and my prediction for the new one.

MusiCured

There is now a pillow with built-in speakers that plays Mp3s. It was developed to play specific relaxing music. I would like to market a modified version that comes preloaded with Adore by Prince and a 100% get-laid-guarantee.

And don't even get me started on these new-fangled musical breast implants...

Humtop?

Some things are ridiculous. The Hummer Laptop is one of them.

Bombed Smurfs

This is part of an actual UNICEF campaign on Belgian television.

T-shirt Hell

A woman was recently kicked off a Southwest Airlines flight for wearing a politically charged t-shirt. Ok, maybe she was kicked off because her t-shirt had the f-bomb on it. Either way, I don't think it's right. But I love the fact that the t-shirt was inspired by the greatest show in the history of television.

As a result, a website called T-Shirt Hell is proclaiming that if you get kicked off a flight for wearing one of their t-shirts, they will "provide you with alternate transportation to get you to your original destination. This transportation includes, but is not limited to, the T-Shirt Hell corporate jet." Sounds good to me. Here are my favorites, though I doubt any of these would do the trick:

NARCOLEPTICS SLEEP AROUND

I STOLE THIS SHIRT FROM A HOMELESS GUY- WHY HE HAD A SHIRT THAT SAYS THIS, I'LL NEVER KNOW

I'M WHAT WILLIS WAS TALKIN' 'BOUT

OB/GYN KENOBI

MEDIUM PIMPIN'

EASY like Sunday morning

I'M NOT GETTING JIGGY, I HAVE PARKINSON'S

Disclaimer: I hate people who wear gimmicky t-shirts, but it's funny to read them on a website.

Soundboards

I'm not sure how people have the time to do this, but I found a site that has what they call 'soundboards', which are basically just flash movies where you can play quotes from your favorite characters at the push of a button. Here are links to some of my favorites. It will surely bring you at least minutes of fun.

Family Guy
Peter
Stewie
Quagmire
Old Guy
Whole Cast

The Simpsons
Homer
Homer Sings
Ralph Wiggum

Other
Ron Burgundy
Cartman
Napoleon Dynamite
The Ladies Man
Office Space
Chris Farley

Spawn of Tomkat

Katie Holmes is pregnant with the baby of an insane, Scientology-loving once cool actor. One guess as to who this might be.

Booooooo!

Wikipedia

It seems like every day I have a new reason to love Wikipedia. If you're not familiar with this site of all sites, it's a free open source encyclopedia that covers everything you could ever think of and more. And not only can you find information here that you would never find anywhere else, it's so current it bleeds.

For instance, in what other encyclopedia could I find articles about the f-word, films that have been considered the greatest ever, or a list of made-up words in The Simpsons?

Noseph

Joe, I will not post pictures of Ashley Judd. And I'm telling Dana.